How do I look

How do you answer the question: / Πώς απαντάς στην ερώτηση;
“How do I look?” / “Πώς σου φαίνομαι;”

The truth is, all people lie. In certain situations – such as when we are under pressure, have to justify our-selves, or want to make a good impression – we tend more towards fibbing and telling tales than when we feel relaxed and self-secure. But, from an ethical point of view, not every lie is bad. You might, for example, lie in order to protect someone.
In communication theory, lies fall into two categories:
do I benefit from the lie or does the person I lied to benefit?
This results in four different outcomes.

1. White lie – only the person lied to benefits:
This is a fine, selfless lie in which you risk potential loss to help someone out. Here, you typically put yourself in the position of the person and, for example, defend the existence of Santa Claus in the knowledge that the lie will be exposed in due time. The altruistic lie gives us a good feeling.

2. Grey lie – both the liar and the person lied to benefit:
“You have lost weight!” Grey lies are often part of cultural norms. In many situations, when you ask: “How are you?”, you expect a lie in response: ”Thank you, things are great!”

3. Black lie – only the liar benefits:
Although you are guilty, you reject all accusations. “No, I didn’t take the money!” It is often also a bold promise, a proactive lie: “If I am elected I will never raise taxes . . . “ Here, bare-faced lying is used to your own advantage.

4. Red lie – no one benefits:
This is the lowest form of lying. Saying something with complete awareness that the other person knows the statement to be false, even if you sometimes end up also inflicting damage on yourself: “The largest audience ever to witness an inauguration.”

~ The Communication Book. 44 ideas for better conversations every day
Mikael Krogerus & Roman Tschappeler
Authors of the international bestseller The Decision Book

#mindstormGR #lies #communication